Down the Rabbit Hole

23 03 2016

Top Ten Things You Probably Don’t Know about the Easter Bunny

10   She’s a girl. “Peter” Cottontail was just a cover from the days when women couldn’t hold important jobs.

9    She’s heavily invested in Cadbury, Jelly-Belly, and Aspen Dental.

8    She has a tattoo of Santa on her butt (can’t handle tequila).

7    Her favorite music is smooth jazz – what, you expected hip hop???

6     She is fabulously wealthy thanks to Trix residuals and that Maybelline test lab lawsuit.

5     Her mother and father were in show business, having recently retired to a hat they won’t be pulled out of.

4    She is a fan of both Beatrix and Harry Potter. Expecto MacGregor.

3    She’s still considering suing that Hefner bastard.

2    Due to multiple instances of stalking and terroristic threats to “Kill the Wabbit,” she has a permanent restraining order against Elmer Fudd.

1     She does not like chocolate bunnies; this in no way makes her white rabbit supremacist.

 

p.s. And furthermore, it was Cottonstein, not Cottontail. Who else could you get to work every Easter?

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8 responses

23 03 2016
Barbara Leonard

Too funny!!!! You are the reincarnation of Erma Bombeck!!!

24 03 2016
scorchedeyebrowstudio

Wow, Barbara, that’s a compliment I’ll treasure!

23 03 2016
Eric Tonningsen

Love!! #8. 🙂

24 03 2016
scorchedeyebrowstudio

Ah, yes, there are lessons to be learned. At least I did not get a tattoo.

24 03 2016
theafine

Loved it, as usual! Feminist rabbits unite!!! Cottonstein, indeed!!! Have a grand Easter, Paula!! We must talk soon

24 03 2016
scorchedeyebrowstudio

Thanks, Teddi. Happy spring!

24 03 2016
janice

Eggscellent! Loved it! XO

24 03 2016
scorchedeyebrowstudio

Hoppy Easter to you and the whole family!

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