Why?

31 10 2012

I love this question. To me, “Why?” means “what was the thought process that led you to a choice?”  “Why?” gives the person asked the opportunity to share their discovery, their knowledge, their passion about something with another who is interested enough to ask.

Some folks, though, hear it as an accusation – “Defend your decision.”  That is more than unfortunate; it is counter-productive.  Unless you feel a choice you’ve made should be challenged, don’t assume that a question about it is a challenge . . .

which brings me to the real beauty of “Why?”

When I am faced with a choice that seems daunting, I look at the options and ask myself why I would pick one thing or action over the other.  Now, don’t get me wrong, I don’t ponder the subconscious reasons for my choice of Coke over Pepsi or why I watch The Mentalist, not Criminal Minds – but I could tell you why if you asked.

Knowing my “why” helps me keep down the cognitive dissonance that results from making decisions that are contrary to what I really want out of my life. Imagining how I would answer a stranger’s “Why?” is a good exercise, too.  If I can’t explain my intended actions, it’s a good sign that I haven’t thought them through sufficiently. This is not defending my decision, it is making certain I have made a well-reasoned one.

Why am I talking about “Why?”  Why do I want to share this thought process with you?

Because being generous with my stuff, my experience, my time makes me more of the person I want to be.  I hope you’ll understand why.

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2 responses

1 11 2012
MARIA ETTEL

I REALLY APPRECIATE YOUR THOUGHT PROCESS HERE.
“WHY” WAS HANK’S PREFERRED METHOD FOR HIS EDUCATION!
IT’S THE WAY WE LEARN. TO THIS DAY I CAN SEE THE WHEELS TURNING WHEN THERE IS A QUESTION IN HIS MIND AS THEY TURNED WHEN HE WAS SMALL.
“WHY” IS A WORD TO OPEN MAGNIFICENT VISTAS OF OUR MINDS, AND A COMPANION WHEN WE ARE IN QUIET THOUGHT.
BLESSINGS!
THANK YOU , PAULA.
XO XO

1 11 2012
Wayne

How is also cool. Tone can ruin why, such as… Why would you do that?

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