Tell Me What You Need

I have lots of life experience – I’m old.

I’ve been here long enough to know some things; an important one is that to get what you need, it is important to be specific with those from whom you need whatever it is.

We have no trouble being specific about what we would like from the drive-thru window. We rarely hesitate to verbalize our desire for one sports team to beat another. We have no problem declaring “paper or plastic?” We do, however, expect our spouses and friends to divine from our vague complaints or tearful tirades what kind of support we are really asking them to provide.

I’ve figured out that, when I am bemoaning some circumstance (or hollering wildly about something), I’m looking for one of two types of response. I either want direction or I want sympathy. Sometimes, I want advice; often, I want allegiance. It is not fair to ask the person who’s on the hearing end of a tale of woe to guess which one it is.

Some days I need a coach, but some days, I need a cheerleader.  The least I can do is hand you the pom poms.

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